Saturday, June 16, 2018

Abled specially....

I read somewhere - "If you Google search the definition of “differently-abled,” the immediate result is a one-word answer: disabled. Nothing more, nothing less. One simple explanation."

It has been 3 yrs 8 months, since we found that our son was specially abled.

Specially abled.. not differently abled. 

Life had shifted so drastically after that, it has turned us around as humans. We started reading hectically trying to understand, what can be done.

So many suggestions, so much confusion. 

While every one talks of shades of grey, when it comes to the matters of the brain (or heart for that matter), people prefer a simple binary response.

Is your child normal? Yes or No.

I always ask, define normal... There is so much different character is every child, that there is no one type that fits all.

The Brain, as we understand now, and its growth is a multi-dimensional structure. Growth has many parameters - motor skills, cognitive behaviour, social interactions, verbal skills, communication skills, and a whole lot more.

However, this understanding and empathy towards same is strangely absent in the present world. Whenever they see a special child, the look is of pity/disgust/irritation. 

Not many people try to observe the struggle the parents go through, their frustrations, their fight to retain sanity and to compete and perform in the world, when their inner worlds are crumbling. Working on rebuilding their confidence and hope every day, day after day.

Submerge their own frustrations and yearning when they see other kids play and interact with others, hold sparkling conversations with adults or sing/showcase their talents.

Or hold their anger, when some condescending words get thrown at them by strangers and relatives alike.


Friday, January 11, 2013

Anger & Me

Am really shocked.. At my own outbursts of anger.

I could see it in the eyes of Nannu & it still hurts.

How did I let my anger get the better of me?? Why am I letting any one get under my skin?

Need to work on my anger!!!!!! URGENTLY !


Friday, August 24, 2012

Stuck midways

The dilemma. An eternal conflict.

These days I seem to be ridden by them. To move or not to move. To shout or not to shout.

To crib or not to crib.

It is easy to say that it is out choice, but which way to move?

Am at a crossroad once again. And the choice will have to make itself up.

Only time will tell. :(

Friday, July 20, 2012

Homecoming or coming home

This was a long pending post which did not get posted

All excited to be going to India. Will get to see, play with rudru. Gonna be fun!
Have been reading excessively on children and their psychology. Remains to be seen how much of it is hogwash. ;)

Sunday, April 29, 2012

The week that Flew... And Crashed

It was an awesome week.. The Last one :)

Watching the Junior's antics, Then departing for my SP, which then kinda crashed... It has been a rollercoasting experience.

I regret nothing though...

Every thing happens for a Reason.. I will believe my calling is elsewhere, if this were to not happen.

Just got this Post from Vas.. Reposting :)

"My promise to my children - as long as I live - I am your parent first, your friend second.
I will stalk you, flip out on you, lecture you, drive you insane, be your worst nightmare and hunt you down like a bloodhound when needed because I LOVE YOU!
When you understand that, I will know that you are a responsible adult.
You will NEVER find someone who loves, prays, cares and worries about you more than I do!
If you don't hate me once in your life - I am not doing my job properly. "


Thursday, April 12, 2012

The lessons of parenting

Parenthood Lesson 1 : the child is always the king. You may plan, forecast, prepare but things happen only when the child deems it appropriate. Or if he is bored. Or irritated. :)

More lessons soon....

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Welcome to the World!

Finally, 3 weeks early, has arrived the Junior.

A Proud feeling.. A Lot of nervousness, even more happiness, Extreme Impatience.. Thats How I feel!

Impatient to be in India and hold that bundle who will one day rock the World :)

Even your name is unique.. Rudranshu krishna.

There is no other person with the same name as you.. You are the First !


Go fill that Google Page. I will be watching, my boy :)

Welcome to the World, Rudranshu... It's a fabulous one, you will love it.

Friday, January 6, 2012

The Year that was..

I wanted to publish this on the New year.. But then, Other things caught up.. Like tequila, friends, fun :)

Anywayz, my top 10 list of Memoirs for the year that was 2011
1. A New Addition to family - The Biggest Happiest Memory, when we had a confirmation of a child's arrival. This is a major life changing decision.
2. Dubai Trip - Short, Sweet & full of fun.. First International shopping & the holes to my pocket.. The PS3, the SLR, Awesome.. :)
3. India Trip - The trip to Rajmundry, visiting all aunts & catching up with childhood
4. Marriage day in Gorongosa - Wildness, Peace & Quiet - Amazing moments all
5. Birthday party - Vas's surprise party, Reunion with all family members...
6. Best "BC" Award - being awarded the best Branch manager award.. The recognition & the happiness surrounding it
7. Vas's Budday :) - The Amazing Sea, The fun in Villa Sands, The champagne & the surprise Chocolate cake, The hospitality & Laziness for the full day.
The bad ones now:
8. Last moment disappointment regd Incentive - The Shock of the incentive, where I was dropped from the hi to the depression of being given least incentive.. Still not out of it :(
9. Pressures of Month ends - The cleaning up acts of things, I did not start..
10. The 'Handover Expert' - Repeated handovers to too many people & not enjoying it one bit..

So well, I have ALL happinesses on Personal front & a mixed bag on professional front...

Lets see this in a year's time.. And see if 2012 was any better.

For now, it is wishes & best hopes for the year to come.

Ciao!

And its a Boy !!

Well... Unwitting confirmation from the DOc that it will be a Boy.

The Wifey is thrilled.. Me less so.

Not for the gender.. I could care less about which gender the child would be.. But of the Suspense & the Surprise, we could have enjoyed later.

Grr... To the Doc !

Anywayz, I had shortlisted names of Girl child ONLY.. So, I guess it is back to drawing board to work on Boy child..


Saturday, December 31, 2011

A New year for us & The First year for U

Another new year comes... Its just as any other, except that there are too many firsts going to happen:
1. The BIGGEST, arrival of our first born... He/she is the most important change thats going to happen in our lives.
2. Major things are in motion on professional front... I hope things work out. It would be the most critical year of my professional life.
3. This is when I would turn 30 !!!

Bigger Roles, Bigger Responsibilities.. Life's gonna be BIG !!!

Bring it on !!! :)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Maaro, Maaro...

The child's started reacting to Vas's words.. Every time she talke to him, hez kicking..

I am very happy !!!

Some one's gettin to kick Vas. :)

Kick your mom as much now, she'll kick ur tushy once u r out.. when u dont study, or when u dont listen.

Enjoy madi.. For now :)

Friday, December 2, 2011

Shocker...

I got the biggest Shock today... And I may have dragged Vas into it too.

Bad thing to do, but the magnitude of it is such..

I feel very sad, but somewhere there is some relief... It has helped me make some decisions which were hanging in Suspense..

For good or bad.. Time will only tell !!!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The First Kick !!

Felt the first kick of the child today..

An Awesome Feeling.. Ofcourse, as the time passes by, it starts feeling less awesome ;)

But for now, it is a time to enjoy !!

Monday, November 28, 2011

Musings of a father-to-be ... 1

Well, ok... The BIG news first... I am gonna be a dad!

After all the euphoria and the hullabaloo, sets in a fact - I have to fit in the shoes, previously occupied by my dad!

Think about family, sacrifice for them, think about children before yourself... BIG ideals, previously considerate antiquated by the same me, would now be my guides???

I heavily doubted it, a few months back... 3 to be exact.

Now, as days pass... I start thinking about the child and what his future should be... What the challenges would be. There is something tremendously exciting about holding a new life in your hands, molding their future, where every decision, every movement of yours would mold their life and how they would be.

As I watch my wife through the pregnancy, growing plumpier, the child growing, I feel a strong sympathy and a sense of great admiration for the female gender.

I cannot imagine my self, going through 9 months of my life, where every intake, every movement, every environment has to be critically looked at, to ensure the child's safekeeping.
Where every passing day, adds weight around my waist sapping out energy and a constant acidity to contend with. Where every night, brings out sleeplessness due to the additional growth in the body. A final end to this growing discomfort being a pain, only the mother can bear.

I feel a strong need to match her efforts for the child or to at least alleviate the discomfort a bit. Hence my meager efforts to take her out, help her avoid chores and to ensure the mood in the house remains jubilant.

While I dread, the days to come... I eagerly wait to hold that bundle of joy that would be my child. :)

Friday, July 2, 2010

SAGS ... :-D

Well, the things is, I was just having fun reading other's blogs & commenting.. When I saw this Tag -

" ‘My Sins against Gender Stereotypes’ and the idea is to list down ten things which you’ve ever wanted, or done, which your gender essentially should not want "

I have been, kinda, dared, to do this & hence here goes:

1. I love matching Mush movies - What !! They are sweet, fun & don't need too much concentration... And remember, guys are supposed to be all about Action movies.

2. I looove chocolates, ice creams - I even broke my leg once for chocolates :-D.. Was in bed for a full month, multiple fractures :-D

3. I love to cook - It is a great way to de-stress yourself (and stress up the wife, who has to clean afterwards)

4. If given an option, I will quit the job & happily sit at home - Bizarre ?? Come on, the luxury of not having to work & getting to do whatever you want! Who wouldn't want it??

5. I like to be color co-ordinated - Heard, this was again a women's domain ! And no, I dont co-ordinate all I wear X-(

6. I am into the mush emotions - It's said, expressing emotions is not manly.. Well, I believe the worst thing that can happen in a marriage is not expressing your emotions... When your own parents can't understand all ur emotions totally, how can a poor wifey??
Secret to a happy marriage, express urself ... For me, atleast (so, sayeth, Baba Ramky :-)))

7. I like shopping - Don't get too much of a chance in Mozambique.. So, yeah! I like to shop.

8. I hate beer - Doesn't really classify into a SAGS, but am now out of ideas... I hate beer, any thing else will do, but no beer pls !!

9.

10.

Ok.. Am out of fuel here.. Will have to draw (/ Copy) inspiration from some other bloggers (/guys)... Will update later.

Oh! And I think I am the first guy to have filled this..

AND, I don't mind wearing Pink shirts.. So, not tagging any one :-P

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Blogs & Friends..

Ok..
Been real long.. No blogs from my end.

Sorry..

Now, that that's done.. We move on.

Now that the year has ended (No, we follow Singapore Accounting, so year ends in the middle.. Stupid Accounting Standards !!), have started my return to humanity.

Was just reading a few blogs of Friends & know what.. they r funny.

Didnt realize that :-D

Like One Mrs.D, who claims to have not failed!!.. She did, when we were still preparing for that no-so-elusive IIM tags

And doesn't borrowing books & not returning, count??

Anyways, blogs are an entertaining way to stay in touch, when you are too busy/lazy to catchup.
Long live blogging!!

A very lazy & buggered,
Me.

ps: I again, promise, to blog regularly :-P

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Life in Other Countries..

I wonder how so many people manage to stay Abroad ...

Away from the families,
Away from the Friends,
Away from that Support system,
Thats makes them run.

Alien people with a Alien language,
With different customs and all.

A Different world,
with a different colour,

Running Alone,
With no team in place,

Things are chaos,
And No order in tht.

The Targets however remain,
And the tensions therefore.

When will this End?

I wonder..

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Of the Heart??

That last statement got me thinking... Musings of the heart??
From time immemorial,it has always been the heart which was supposed to be the custodian of Emotions..

Why is this so?? Ever wondered?? Even the earliest of Books, the Bible there are references about the Heart - 
"Go to Pharaoh, for I have hardened his heart and the hearts of his officials so that I may perform these miraculous signs of mine among them'" (Exodus 10:1)

Even the earliest of Philosophers, Aristotle, thought of the Heart as being the seat of all thought, Emotion & Reason.

Now, I don't know whether it is true or not... but I could probably understand the rational behind it.

In earliest of times, when without the modern day Stethoscopes or the Cutting-edge technology to understand the workings of the brain, the only visible (or rather Audible) part of the body was the Heart.

It responded to every single stimulus - Fear, Anger, Hunger, Happiness, Sadness, Agony & Ecstasy. The body responded & We understood or rather mis-understood.

We believed the Responder of the stimulus to be the Stimulus creator... Well at least that part of our thinking hasn't changed.

Even now, we believe the people responding to be the actual people responsible. In an accident, we fight with the person who stopped behind to avoid a crash thinking him to be the one responsible.

Forget at this micro-level, even countries respond this way. What was the cold war??? A mis-understanding between two large countries that the other is trying to destroy it. Every rogue incident of violence became a carefully cultivated plan by the other to destroy us. This lead to Paranoia of un-precedented proportions leading to each accumulating enough ammunition to bomb the world 300 times.

If, at sometime, the heads of both countries had come out & tried to talk each other plainly, without seeking to have an upperhand or get advantage, all that money could have been used constructively & the two most advanced countries would have had their places secure.

See, what has transcribed. One, the Soviet Union, is no more. The Second, USA, is officially a bankrupt country. If it was not for its War stockpile & clout it pulls in the world, this country would have suffered Inflation, that would put Zimbabwe to shame.

Where a single act of faith & compassion for one another, as one of the same race, would have sufficed, we ended up spending so much money creating useless weapons & continue spending more to safe guard them. What a pity!!!

Life & Its Meaning

Many a blogs have I started & stopped... Writing about one topic then another... Guess, this is another of such chances.

But, now I shall be honest to myself. I want a space... where I can be myself, where no customs dictate, where no relations demand.

I want to dedicate this blog to just that.. Freedom to be yourself. 

And to the musings of the heart...